Who is really your best friend? Your dog or your spouse?

Ok, check this out....I tried this...and guess what? It really, REALLY works!

1. Lock your spouse and your dog in the trunk of your car.
2. Wait one hour.
3. Open up and see who is really happy to see you.

One day a man went to an auction. While there, he bid on a parrot. He really wanted this bird, so he got caught up in the bidding. He kept on bidding, but kept getting outbid, so he bid higher and higher and higher.

Finally, after he bid way more than he intended, he won the bid - the parrot was his at last!

As he was paying for the parrot, he said to the Auctioneer, "I sure hope this parrot can talk. I would hate to have paid this much for it, only to find out that he can't talk!"

"Don't worry." said the Auctioneer, "He can talk. Who do you think kept bidding against you?"

There was a man who traveled all around the world. Every city he stopped in he would buy something for his mother and send it to her.

On one such stop he found a parrot that spoke thirty different languages. He immediately bought it and sent it home to his mother.

A few days later he calls his mother. "Did you like the parrot?" he asked her.